Balldo: My Balls-to-Dildo Review

Balldo. It’s a sex toy for men that turns his ball sac into a dildo. Yes, it really is that simple.

Did you know that a man’s ball sack has almost the same amount of nerve endings as a women’s vulva?

No? Well, that’s just the first of today’s many surprises from this UK based ballgasm company.

Rocco Siffredi. You may have heard of him. He’s been in more porno movies than I’ve had hot dinners. And as a result of that, he’s pushed the boundaries of what goes into a sex scene.

Why do I mention Rocco? Well, he’s the only guy I can ever recall who used his own nadgers to penetrate a woman. That’s nuts, I remember thinking at the time 😏. Unfortunately I can’t recollect exactly which movie it was in which I saw him do this. But rest assured, I’m fairly sure I remember seeing it. And I’m fairly sure it was Rocco.

It’s good that I’m confident about that.

Now, where Rocco and I are similar is that we have both been in the industry a long time. I’ve been actively involved in the adult entertainment world since 1997, though even by that point Mr. Siffredi had been making videos for seven years already.

Because I’ve been in and around sex toys for a long time, there is very little that I haven’t tried.

But a toy that converts your testicles into a dildo?

Well… it just goes to show that even after all this time I can still be shocked by the creativity of the vulgar mind.

Where’s Balldo?

Whilst I was late to the party on discovering Balldo, over 1,400 other people certainly weren’t.

What I admire most is how Jerry Davies and his co-founder Ellie didn’t jump straight in, make something, and try to sell it.

Instead they used the Indiegogo crowdfunding platform to test the waters, ensure there would be sufficient interest, and only then did they begin production of the Balldo.

Apparently their Indiegogo page got over 600,000 views whilst it was open to new backers. I guess plenty of those would have been curious on-lookers, and maybe their pitch went viral, who knows?

Whatever happened, there was enough interest to give the green light and from then on in it was b-all systems go.

What Does It Feel Like – ♂️ For Him (Me)

Before I bought the Balldo I was deeply skeptical. My biggest concern was it looked very much like it was going to be painful.

Painful to put on, painful to use, and potentially pure pain if anything were to go wrong.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that most guys will have been whacked in the nadgers at least once in their life. Perhaps it was accidental – an errant football hoofed into your ghouls rather than their goals. Or perhaps it was more deliberate – an irate partner, unruly child, or God forbid, you’re into that sort of thing out of choice.

Being completely honest I was expecting that sort of pain at some point during our testing of the Balldo.

But that wasn’t at all the case.

Upon arrival I had three reactions:

  1. Nervous laughter
  2. Thinking yeah, that does kinda look like a Dildo, and…
  3. Concern I would never get the two rings around my nut sack.

The nervous laughter came from my wife opening the package without me knowing, then she popped her head around the door brandishing the clear plastic packaging with balldo™ emblazoned on it for all to see. I had told her about a surprise toy we would be reviewing, but even so it was still a little… embarrassing?

There is absolutely no need to remove the balldo from the packaging to see that yes, it very much does look like a dildo.

However, the best way to describe it would be to compare it to programs like Masterchef, Great British Menu, and other fancy restaurant TV shows. You know the kind, where they take a thing you have heard of and then “deconstruct” it.

Whether through woman’s intuition, or simply seeing how beetroot red my face had turned, my wife sensed my embarrassment, dutifully placed the package on my desk and departed with a giggle.

Whats In The Box?

The balldo packaging is fairly well thought out. Unfortunately it does involve single use plastics, but I was happy that it was not heat sealed shut. I hate it when I buy something from Amazon, usually computer parts, and I end up having to hack away at the plastic with a pair of scissors.

With a fairly exertive tug the packaging comes apart giving immediate access to the two rings and the main dildo itself.

The way the packaging is set out – with the two rings above the dildo bit – is how the balldo is meant to be worn. Although you may not need both rings. I had a bit of childish fun laying the rings flat and making a simplistic willy shape. Ho ho, I’ll never grow up.

One other note with regards to packaging is storage. Without a storage bag, the options are you keep the toy in the box (err, unlikely), or it joins your other sex toys in your top drawer. Personally I hate my toys being loose. Not because I am going to lose them, but because they get dusty and that’s just one more step to sort out before using them. It ruins that possible spontaneity.

Maybe that’s just me.

Practicalities Of Balldo Ownership

This does raise the question of how easy is it to hide the Balldo?

Very, would be my answer. In the dull grey version of the toy that I received, it doesn’t look that much like a sex toy at first glance, especially not on its side. It’s certainly not a vein throbbing rabbit eared vibrator at any rate.

And whilst there is no storage bag, keeping this toy clean both before and after use is really simple. Just rinse under the tap. There are no difficult nooks and cranny’s, it’s all very straightforward to wash.

My main concern before opening the package was how the hell I was going to fit any of this stuff over my nuts.

Fortunately, when you actually touch the super soft silicone you do realise how stretchy and pliable the material actually is. Whilst everything is taut at rest, it stretches very easily which was very reassuring.

Also after an initial “hands on” with the toy, I was pleasantly surprised by how sturdy the dildo part actually is. With most of the middle cut out, no one would want the tip to be all floppy. No sir. Thankfully it is not only the right amount of stiff, but it also has a lovely amount of wobble.

Putting on the Balldo can be a bit challenging, especially if you’re not used to using cock rings and similar stretchy toys on your genitals.

Being a male sex toy tester I guess by now I am quite experienced with such things.

Preparing To Use Your Balldo

You will need to be clean shaven all over your balls, and ideally cropped closely all over elsewhere. This is just good hygiene, and besides, it’s not the 1970s anymore. Then, liberally apply a water based lube all over, including at the base of your shaft. No one likes chafing.

From there it I’d say it takes me about a minute to get the Balldo on, though I haven’t accurately timed myself. Having a towel handy is a good idea as once you’re ready, your hands will likely be coated in lube and wiping them all over the clean bedsheets seems to really wind up my mrs.

I’m going to advise you have a “dry run” before you first use this toy in the bedroom. Figure out whether you need one or two of the included spacer rings. And by dry run, I do of course still mean with plenty of lube.

Anyway once it’s on, the Balldo stays securely in place.

If you do regularly use cock rings, your wife / partner may have taken charge and being the one to put the ring on you. That kind of play can definitely get you both more in the mood. And that’s fine for a cock ring. But I wouldn’t advise you let her take the lead with the Balldo. It’s not the easiest thing to get on, and your nuts are… sensetive.

All that said, putting on the Balldo is generally not a painful process. It may be slightly uncomfortable for a few seconds, but it is not painful. Just take your time and be generous with the lube.

Ready To Balldo

Prior to receiving my Balldo I had read plenty of reviews from other couples who had given it a try. I’d say a good 70% of those reviews had experienced difficulty with the penetration process.

I guess we should count ourselves lucky then, because whilst standard missionary was never going to work, all it took was popping a pillow under my wife’s bum, then having her bend her knees and rock back with her legs up and with all the lube, things slipped in with none of the issues I had read about elsewhere.

We found that letting my wife direct and control the penetration had the most success. It does feel unusual to be being tugged and manipulated by your balls, but I can’t say I didn’t enjoy the sensation. Thankfully she was very careful and gentle.

There’s a fair amount of preparation that goes into using the Balldo. With the shaving, the lubing, donning the device, and then the whole novelty factor of what you look like to your wife as you’re wearing the Balldo, I found it all rather stimulating.

Which is to say that even before we got down to the sex part, I was already very turned on.

Perhaps too turned on.

Much like with timing how long it took to get the Balldo on, I didn’t time how long it took to get me off. I’d say less time… frustratingly less, but those 30 seconds were intense.

What surprised me most was how quickly I came that first time we used the Balldo. It was one of the most unique orgasms of my life. Entirely unstimulated on my cock, I felt like my wife was squeezing (or milking?) the cum right out of me.

Everything combined – the mental, the physical, the craziness – and before I knew it, far too quickly actually, I reached a toe curlingly intense orgasm that sent a twitching, unrestrained blast that landed on my wife’s neck, followed by several more jolts that couldn’t quite match the first for distance.

After cleaning up and removing the Balldo, watching my wife reach her own orgasm was as enjoyable as ever, but the two acts felt disconnected. I’d had my pleasure, she had hers, but they didn’t feel like one combined experience.

Not to be put off – and to make sure I had enough experience with the Balldo to write this review – we did try again. Admittedly, not immediately. It was well over a month later, after too much wine and both feeling very relaxed over the Christmas break, that I suggested we try it again.

Another Go With Balldo

Sadly, the second time around wasn’t as good.

We did experience more difficulty with penetration. Possibly this was our choice of position – doggy for a change. Maybe it was because it didn’t work so easily that it spoiled the mood whilst we fannyed about trying to “make it work”.

Finally, we did succeed. Doggy-ed persistence is sometimes the key.

On the one hand it was still as hot as I remembered seeing and feeling my nuts disappearing inside my wife.

On the other hand it was a case of, OK, so what do I do with my cock? Because of the angles it doesn’t work for penetration elsewhere. I cannot imagine it’s possible, even for a contortionist, to wangle the Balldo so you can solo-DP your partner. I mean, more credit to you if you can, but I certainly couldn’t.

Because we had trouble with the initial position, I wasn’t anything like as turned on as on our first foray into ball sex.

There is an awkwardness to the way this toy needs to be used. Think about it for a second. Your body is hardwired, thanks to countless millennia of evolution, to thrust with your cock. You don’t even need to buy nor try the Balldo to imagine how strange it feels to have to thrust with your balls.

After a minute or so of tentative thrusting and testing, we made the executive decision to ditch the device and do it the old fashioned way.

Best Positions For Using A Balldo

One thing that I think Balldo could do better is to give some suggestions of positions. Part of the fun of this toy is being able to see it, because it’s so unusual. If you can’t actually see it, it loses a lot of the fun. Again, more on that below.

The downside to this is I’ve not been able to repeat it, and for reasons we will cover below, it’s not looking likely I’ll experience anything like that again soon. Which is kinda a shame, but if you’re a glass half full kinda guy then hey, I guess I got to experience it once, right?

My gripe with the Balldo is really that it’s too much of a novelty. It was definitely pretty hot trying something new with the wife. It’s not every day you penetrate your partner with your balls, at least not in my house.

But once you’ve done it, what is there to make me want to do it again?

Well, aside from the interesting orgasm, not a whole lot. Completely unstimulated on my dick, I very quickly (within ~10 minutes) wanted a second round where we would do more ‘normal’ sex. I still needed it. It wasn’t that I was unsatisfied, but rather I just wanted more.

The problem with that is that the Balldo, with all the lube needed and my wife’s aversion to being covered in that stuff, she had already vacated to shower and rinse it all off. When she came back, the mood had gone. We had a bit of a laugh about it, then I rinsed the thing off and put it in the drawer with all the other toys and that was that.

What Does It Feel Like – ♀️ For Her (Wife)

There were a few interesting comments from my wife after we had used the Balldo.

The novelty aspect of seeing a weird bright pink dildo with my shaven nuts trapped inside it was, in her words, funny.

Thorough and in-depth analysis like that is why I write the reviews here, not my wife.

With the festive period behind us, and the hang overs forgotten, I have since probed my wife for more feedback. Here’s some that could crush a man’s ego just as much as her squeezing whilst you are inside her could crush your nuts:

It felt unimpressive.

Wife’s opinion of being penetrated by the Balldo

The problem, as best I could extract, is that a dildo is usually a fairly large and impressive thing. At least, that’s how I would describe the ones my wife has in her collection. And they don’t need to be handled with the care that a man’s bollocks require.

That combination of worrying that being too rough may (would!) hurt me, and the lack of length and girth of the Balldo meant the possibility of her reaching a penetrative climax was almost non-existant.

However, she did say that seeing me receiving pleasure is always nice (aww), and that first hands free and very unexpected cum shot was very kinky.

So that’s something.

Would I have clicked the buy button on a Balldo had it not been for this blog? Honestly, I am unsure.

Working in the men’s sex toy industry I couldn’t help but notice the Balldo. For a while it has been everywhere. In press releases. On other industry blogs. And then on the various sex toy review sites I read on the regular.

I guess curiosity got the better of me.

Tips For Shaving Your Balls

You absolutely must have a shaven nut sack to use this toy. You know the pain you feel when you notice a stray nose hair, and you stand in front of the bathroom mirror, get it between your finger nails… and yank?

Yeah, well imagine that, but with clumps of your pubes snagged and ragged as your balls dip in and out of your partners privates. It’s not a happy picture. Get ’em shaved.

Here are a few tips for shaving your testicles:

  1. Trim the hair on your testicles with scissors or electric clippers before you start shaving. This will make it easier to get a close, smooth shave.
  2. Soften the hair by taking a warm shower or bath before you start shaving.
  3. Use a good quality, sharp razor. Make sure the blade is clean and free of rust or other debris. Don’t use an old school safety razor. Use a Gilette or similar, something forgiving.
  4. Use a shaving cream or gel to help the razor glide smoothly over your skin and to reduce irritation.
  5. Shave in the direction of hair growth to minimise irritation and ingrown hairs.
  6. Rinse the area thoroughly with warm water after you finish shaving. I do mine in the shower.
  7. Best not to apply aftershave.

Remember to be very careful when shaving this sensitive area. It is important to use a sharp razor and to take your time to avoid nicking or cutting yourself. If you are worried about shaving your testicles or are not comfortable doing it yourself, you might ask your partner or a 💈 professional barber 💈 to help you.

My Verdict On The Balldo

New. Interesting. Different.

There are are heck of a lot of new men’s sex toys released each year.

Only a handful of them are interesting.

Very few are different.

The last time I experienced a new sensation when orgasming was the first time I had a prostate orgasm.

I felt the same way (in a different way, if that makes sense) when I had my hands free, balls deep orgasm using the Balldo.

But it is absolutely a novelty item for me. Or, should I say, for us.

After two uses I’m not sure if it will ever come out of the drawer again.

Where Can I Buy My Own Balldo?

Feeling adventurous?

You can buy your own Balldo at the following online sex toy stores: